Crafty Corner – Medusa Mask

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Yo motherf******,

I’ve crafted. I’ve done craft. And above are  the hands of someone who has sweated blood, sweat, gravy and egg for the love of all things craft.

If you’re a long term inmate of this blog you’ll remember my Crafty Corner efforts were an attempt to become one of the UK’s top bloggers. As I mentioned back in the olden days, the top bloggers in this country all do crafty shizzle and me wanted a piece of that bidniss bizzatch. So this is Crafty Corner 2.0 – crafting goes bad ass.

Yeah crafting CAN be bad ass. Crafting is hardcore. Have you seen how many Pinterest boards are dedicated to craft? About four times the amount devoted to beards, AND THAT’S A LOT.

Some people find crafting relaxing, in the same way that extreme sports or dogging is relaxing for others. But for some it’s this mad, crazy ride man. A rush. A buzz. Something adrenalin fuelled. Something one craves.

You speak to other crafters. They know what it’s all about. And they’re serious about their craft of craft.

You ask a crafting question on Twitter, like I did on Monday night after being told a Medusa mask needed to be made and sh****** the sh****** sh*** out of myself. and SERIOUS crafting types will respond.

a tweet about crafting

They KNOW their **** and their **** is serious.

I got responses. Oh did I get responses and all my queries were answered in seconds. A suggestion of cutting cardboard toilet rolls along the bias confused me. ‘WHAT’S A BIAS?’  asked I, whose previous understanding of bias was a right-wing lean in some sections of the media, but now I get it. I now know what I’m doing.

Crafters can make anything out of anything. Know this. It’s no coincidence that those accused of witchcraft were hunted down or burnt at the stake. It’s not the ‘witch’ people were scared of but the ‘craft’. People in the 17th century FEARED the crafters of this world. They were scared of those people who can turn a piece of tissue into something wonderfully decorative but slightly flammable in seconds. People who can knot unknottable things, fold cardboard in ways that defy physics, bring paper and cloth TO LIFE!

I got my answers, and I got down to it.

Spent, exhausted but on an adrenalin high this is how I looked afterwards.

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But this is what I’d MADE.

Medusa2

If you want to know how to make it, then I cuold tell you. But then I’d have to kill you.

Basically, get paint, paint ****, BOOM. That’s how we do it baby.

I can’t wait for my next crafting fix. Yeah, this is crafting.

Breaking Bad style.

Thanks to @ACheshireMum @Stellabranch @MissInformed11 @sathlondonshona @TheLady_Sadie for their crafting advice, but not to@MaggieSimpson49 who suggested I use green beans.

And thanks for reading.

So whaddaya think? Is this now a crafting blog? And what mark would you give me for my mask? Please leave any comments in my commentulum section.

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