Friends and friendship


There are these people in my life. They’re called Friends. Not the people from the TV series. These are funnier. And real. Not small people who live in a box on the wall. They’re in my life. And I’m so glad for that.

One of these friends is someone who I don’t see very regularly at all. But I know that if I called her and said “hi, how’s shizzle”, we’d talk for hours, like we did when we were 17. I owe her a long and explanatory email and I’ll do that. I think about her and her wonderful family every day. Her husband is one of Life’s brilliant people. I’ve never seen the dude not smile, and his smile makes any room brighten. So, Big Ears, if you’re reading this, I just want to say Thank You. For so much. More than you’ll ever know.

Another friend of mine is a trained telephone counsellor. It’s not her job but it’s something she gives her spare time to. That’s the sort of person she is. She is one of the funniest people I’ve ever met. She’s a stress head, her words not mine, but it’s a key part of her and something that anyone who knows her gets. When we first met, something clicked. Not in a weird and inappropriate way but I saw something immediately which made me think that this person will be a friend for life. It also made me think, have we been here before? I’m a logical person. When we die we’re food for worms etc, but after we met I wondered. My grandfather used to say to me, when I was a puppy, ‘Spencer. You’re an old soul on young shoulders. You’ve been here before’ which kinda went against all his staunch Roman Catholic beliefs, but I feel like this when I think about this person. Have we been friends before? Have we all had lives prior to this one? If so, then I reckon she and I have been friends in all of them. She also has an amazing husband who is a total legend. And he looks like Russell Crowe so there’s a bit of a bromance thing gwan there. Their advice and friendship, support and total honesty has been invaluable. I want to thank them both, for putting up with me, and for pulling me out of a hole when I needed it. I hope I can be as supportive a friend to these guys as they’ve been to me.

Then there’s this other friend of mine who says totally inappropriate things, knows it, doesn’t give a shit, and it’s one of the many reasons why I adore her. She’s an incredible, brilliant, feisty woman, and she’s had some shit going down in her life. I’m fiercely protective of her but that’s because I’m a loyal friend. And she deserves nothing but good things. Always. Karma will sort stuff out for her, I know this. Karma has a way of biting others reet painfully in the arse but she’s always been balls deep honest with me and I respect her words, thoughts and honesty. I’m just going to text her now, and ask what she’s wearing. As she’s done with me so many times. I hope it’ll make her smile.

I want to mention another friend. And this may sound weird but we’ve not met yet. But I know I’ll meet her and her amazing family soon. She’s become a true and trusted friend recently, and we chat via FB chat. How can a friend be a friend when you’ve not met, I hear some of you ask? Because. Social networking is such a part of Life now that it’s possible to connect with people in so many different and wonderful ways. People you would never usually meet perhaps, because of geography or time. Would I know this person if it wasn’t for social networking? No. Am I glad I do because of it? Fuck yeah! This person is inspiring, a nurturing soul in so many ways, and cares so much for those around her. She’s funny, smart, and her family and home sounds like the best place to be at any time. She says “we’re all crazy here” but guess what? If that’s crazy then I’d take that over sanity any day of the week. And if she’s reading this on her phone and smiling, again, then good.

I have a lot of friends, thankfully. I could wax lyrical about more of them. And I hope they recognise themselves from these cryptic descriptions. The one who made me lunch on her birthday this year. The one who knitted me a scarf. The one who tells me I should stop fucking swearing on my blog. The one who told me ‘when I struggle through the day, without any catastrophies happening, I am happy. It is a form of happiness’ which is one of my favourite quotes of all time. The one who emailed me a long time ago asking about blogging, and how to, despite being an incredible writer in her own right. The one in the US who knows just how much I hate the Royal Mail. The one who ran across the room and gave me the biggest hug ever at Britmums, almost crushing my ribs. She’s small in stature but big in presence and boy has she got some strength. I wouldn’t mess. Fight Club for her would be a breeze.

Those who know me and get me and don’t judge. I want to thank them all for everything. For any second they’ve ever given me. I’m truly blessed. I have two wonderful children and people in my life that make the blue days glorious. I should never forget this. And this, unashamedly soppy but honest and necessary post goes out to anyone who’s ever said ‘Hey Spencer. How’s it going?’ This is a love letter to friendship, and to all my friends.

I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

And thanks for reading.


8 responses to “Friends and friendship

  1. Great post, Spencer. I’m a great believer that you get what you give. If you’ve got all these amazing people in your life, then you must be pretty damn decent too

  2. Hear hear Pols80. You reap what you sow, and Spencer you sow a whole lotta love. Despite having never met you, you deserve the very best friends because you really are a lovely, caring man.

  3. That’s all so beautiful. 🙂

    Sometimes we don’t know who are friends are (or aren’t). Sometimes asking for help is the best thing you can do. I’ve been through some rubbish in the last couple of years and friends I’ve not seen for ages or not even met have all been fantastic.

  4. That’s a beautiful, heart-felt and honest post. Loved it. True what everyone’s saying you definitely get back what you put in. I haven’t know you(virtually) for very long and all you’ve shown me is loves. Your a diamond G 😉

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